the weird uncle

There is a weird uncle in every family. You can spot them right away when the whole family is together at a major event like a funeral or a wedding. I am not a wedding crasher but I end up at a lot of weddings and funerals and there is no escaping the weirdness.

Let me be quick to say that I don't think any of my siblings are weird and none of my kids or their kids are weird but somehow the weird gene shows up at big family gatherings.
My other disclaimer is that the weird uncle may be a pretty nice guy and in other groups he might be the most normal person, coolest, nicest, most intelligent, and most astute person out of a hundred. But he is with his family for this occasion and within his family he drinks out of the other side of the cup. He's in a close talking family, or a loud family, or a country family, or a city family, and whatever his family is, he's not.

I'll give you some examples: You go to a funeral and you quickly recognize that most of the men are follically challenged, they are bald, really bald, bald as a billiard ball bald. And then there is the one guy who is loaded with hair all over his head and he has it pulled back into an enormous pony tail. He is the weird uncle. He just doesn't fit. Where did he come from? At other gatherings where people have heads with hair, long beautiful hair, shining, gleaming, streaming etc. etc. hair, he wouldn't be the weird uncle. He would just be another hairy person. In that gathering the weird uncle might be the one guy who has a number 3 or 8 on everything he owns. He has a jacket with automobile part and lubricant advertisements all over it with a matching hat that he never takes off.

Sometimes there is a weird aunt in a family crowd who dresses all in black, mostly leather, has her hair slicked back, and hangs out with the guys. Again, there's nothing wrong with that and in many settings she would not stick out except she happens to be related to a lot of symphony loving, opera attending, polo shirt wearing, pastel looking people sipping lattes.

Occasionally there is a weird friend who shows up and the friend probably takes the rap as the weird uncle or aunt just because most people at the family gathering don't know who they are. I once saw a woman who fit in that category in my mind because I didn't know who she was and she had brought her pet snake to the occasion. The snake made its home in her bra and was sticking its head out of her cleavage and flicking its tongue like snakes do. I don't remember much of the wedding but I do remember snake woman. This woman was quite noticeable and yet wouldn't have stuck out so much at the viper of the month club or the snake handling society, or the living snake attire folks.

The funny thing is, if you go to enough family gatherings, you are probably going to end up as the weird aunt or uncle. And you're normal, go figure.